Intel, AOL and Microsoft email beta test program equals untold wealth

Here something that you might want to read it was on the news and as well all know, the news doesn’t lie!!
Subject: FW: PLEEEEEASE PRETTY PLEASE READ THIS!!!! It was on the news!

Dear friends,

I bet you’re probably thinking, ‘oh, this must be another one of those totally bullshit money making emails’, but no, trust me, this is real beyond your wildest dreams. First, let me assure you, I am a real, genuine and bona fide attorney and when I say AOL and Intel will follow through on their promises, I am not kidding. They know full well, that if they don’t follow through with their promises, a regiment of fully suited, brief case carrying, ambulance chasin, litigatin lawyers like me will be on them like white on rice. They fear facing a multi-billion dollar class action suit, like the one files by General Mills against General Electric for general trademark infringements not too long ago.

Bill Gates is sharing his fortune. Microsoft and AOL are now the largest Internet companies and in an effort to make sure that Internet Explorer remains the most widely used program Microsoft and AOL are running and email beta test. Now, I know I was just talking about AOL and Intel a moment ago, but that is besides the point. When you forward this e-mail to friends, Microsoft can and will track it (if of course you are using Microsoft Windows) for a two week period. During that time, For every person that you forward this e-mail to, Microsoft will pay you $245.00, for every person that you sent it to that forwards it on, Microsoft will pay you $243.00 and for every third person that receives it, you will be paid $241.00. Within two weeks, Microsoft will contact you for your address and then send you a cheque.

I thought this was a scam myself, but just to be on the safe side, I went down to Cheap-Email-Lists-R-Us and bought a list of one million email addresses belonging to people who love to forward emails. I then forwarded this email to them and ask them to forward it to as many people as they could so they would all also be able to cash in on the cash fest email beta test program. I was pleasantly surprised when after two weeks Microsoft contacted me for my address then I received a check in the mail for $245,987,116,572.27 in $USD!! When I went to my bank to desposit it into my checking account, the bank teller almost fainted. If anybody can afford this, Bill Gates is the man. It is all marketing expense to him. You really do need to cash in on this email beta test before it ends, so you can be rich like me.

We are not going to help them out with their email beta test program without getting a little something in return. A couple of months ago, my brother’s girlfriend who works for AOL and Intel in their legal department decided to get into this. When I went to visit him last month, she pulled out a giant cardboard check for $118,233,615.12 stamped ‘PAID IN FULL’.

Like I said before, I know the law, and this is real since it was also on the news. Intel and AOL are discussing a merger to make them the largest internet company, and in an effort to make sure AOL remains the most widely used program, Microsoft is paying for their email beta test program for them.

I was leery about this email tracking until I discovered the high tech methods that were developed to implement such a large scale email beta tracking test successfully.. read on!

When I was carefully scrutinizing the email I received, I noticed something under the magnifying lens.

 

Yes, on the tiny dot above the ‘i’ in the word Microsoft there was a tiny microchip imbedded in the text of the email. So, I decided to forward a copy of the email to myself to see what happened. When the email arrived in my inbox, I opened it, and immediately noticed a tiny ant crawl onto my screen.

The ant grabbed the microchip, and then I followed it. The ant then headed out the door and headed to a local ant colony, where the microchip was passed on to other ants in a sort of pony ant express relay where they eventually transported the microchip to Microsoft Headquarters in Redmond Washington where it was plugged into some sort of tracking registration machine. The entire operation is ‘green’ too, since the microchips are re-used over and over in other emails sent out.

Comments

[danie]

how do I enter the microsoft/aol e-mail beta test competition

[I.M. Broken]

It may be too late, the email has been forwarded around the world 88 million times being forwarded to over 10 trillion email accounts (many of them numerous times).. If you didn't get your copy, I am afraid it may be too late.. the beta test will be ending momentarily. Please don't stomp on any of the carrier ants by accident